on being published...
01/12/2004 02:38 a.m.
images, my hs litmag, is publishing 3 of my pieces!

6708 cahill, man as god, and evolve- whee. i love those poems... but now i cant submit any visual work (cos i'm on staff, and staff can only have 3 pieces published).
but yay!

heh, that's all.
peace:a
I am currently Excited
I am listening to elvis costello- radio radio

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this candlelit clutter is a comfort.
01/11/2004 07:14 a.m.
i'm just sitting here, kind of mellowing out. i dont know what's going on in this little head of mine, but it's rather inconsequetial, heh. i've been using my pathetic journal more than my livejournal or deadjournal lately; which is pretty amazing, considering how i never used to update.
the fire is dancing, though it is struggling to keep a breath. instead of burning so brightly as it's intent, the candlefire is drowning in the wax that it melted. i've never seen a more beautiful suicide. i am strangely at peace at the moment; i've had a good night. i'm feeling slightly spiritual at the moment. for the first time in a long time, i feel like my words may have made a difference to someone. subtly, but nonetheless a difference.
the candle is making a comeback, perhaps i should not extinguish all hope for it.
i've come to the conclusion that there are two main types of poets: those who look inward and express it outwardly, and those who look outwardly, process it internally, and then add hints of the internal process without directly admitting it. i find myself more and more being the latter of those two; i guess that i just believe in the world around me more than i believe in myself. it's an odd sort of comfort that, no matter what i go through, the world is indifferent. and it always will be to what is inflicted upon or gathered from it. the world will always be there, in whatever shape we mold it. and there will always be something new to discover, some object that has never been photographed, some dream that has never been realized by anyone. and it is in this unique nature that i form my own nature.
i am not sure if this makes any particular sense to you, but it does to me. the internal fire is burning because the candle is still burning; and knowing that if it should ever chose to extinguish, there is always the lighter to start it up again.
peace:a
I am currently Peaceful
I am listening to pete yorn- for nancy

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light does not have its own shadow;
01/08/2004 02:49 a.m.
i'm trying hard to look away, like you asked.
but it's hard to do, when you always seem set to 'self-destruct'.
I am currently Bothered
I am listening to blue october- calling you

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something of note
01/07/2004 01:07 a.m.
just something cool i learned today:
i go to school with siblings who are cousins of gavin hayes from dredg. i thought that was kinda cool.
i'll leave you alone now.
peace:a

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born of a broken man
01/05/2004 03:16 a.m.
my fears hunt me down
capturing my memories
on a frontier of loss;
they try to escape across the street where
jesus stripped bare
and raped the spirit he was supposed to nurture
in the name of mine
in the name of mine

born of a broken man
but not a broken man.
born of a broken man
never a broken man.
born of a broken man
but not a broken man.

the autumn leaves have since fell from him
and empty glass of himself shattered somewhere within.
his thoughts like a hundred moths,
trapped in a lampshade somewhere within.
their wings banging and burning
all through endless nights
forever awake, he lies shaking and stirring
praying for someone to turn off the light.
-Z. De La Rocha
I am currently Alienated
I am listening to rage against the machine- born of a broken man

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they're gone.
01/05/2004 12:14 a.m.
well, my archives of shit are gone.
215 poems.
143 comments.
4000 reads. (how was that 4000 reads?)
gone.

wowza.
I am currently Alienated
I am listening to red hot chili peppers- californication

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applications.
01/03/2004 10:39 p.m.
there were a few applications i liked today. the paragraphs were interesting; one, i particularily liked (and accepted, hoping that the author was being tounge in cheek, because their poem was really magnificant):
my name is kely and u need me.
i have been in a state of culture shhh-ock since the hour i moved to new yorke from suburbia. there's much to be told from from my materialistic, shallow, cynical stance..+ thank you.
i thought it to be rather funny. and then i read one which was horribly pretentions basically saying "everyone loves me, no one has ever said a bad thing about me"- and then the poem was rather... not good.
but these things are just opinion, and nothing more.
heh. gotta fly.
peace:a
I am currently Bemused
I am listening to starsailor- silence is easy

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one day, i'll be famous
01/03/2004 09:04 p.m.
so, i was thinking. i have to do a final project for art of film; and i'm going to be doing a short film; however, i came to this thought a couple of nights ago: what is film, if not for the representation of dialogue? because, i figure that, if we wanted dialogue, we would read a book. so, i'm going to be making a film. but i think i'm going to shoot it completely without dialogue; or very little at that. because i feel like it is much more creative to convey a story through visuals than it is to tell a story with concrete words. at least, it's more difficult to do so without words.
in other wrds, i'll probably be making a music video. or something of the kind. who knows.
heh, i'mma go.
ta ta!
[peace:a]
I am currently Bored
I am listening to white stripes- tiny acorns

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they will be gone.
01/02/2004 08:38 p.m.
232 poems will be deleted, unless i get some more to save. that's a lot of poems. that's 160 comments, gone. but not a big deal, i'll have cleaned up my library a ton. it's dilluted as it is, so i'm just trying to spiffy it up.

i'll be deleting them on sunday, so if there are any poems you dont want to be disposed of, better tell me quick!
allright, that's all. ta the ta.

peace:a
I am currently Bleh
I am listening to the strokes- 12:51

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the polyphonic spree
01/01/2004 07:46 p.m.
this group is freaking amazing. you know that one beetle commercial with the ipod in it? it has that music going on, 'light and day is more than you'll say...' that's the polyphonic spree. it's orchestral pop. it's just so amazing to listen to... i'm currently engrossed in the 36 minute long finally. it's an astounding record; it's out there, but if you're looking for some expansion on the musical horizon, perhaps you should check it out. just my thoughts.
peace:a
I am currently Awestruck
I am listening to the polyphonic spree- section 10 (a long day)

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