I was born a prodigal son with tattoos plastered across my face. In a mysterious &
enchanting old world script they said, “Dear Mother, I will recklessly forget your
glory. I will scatter the riches you give me upon a sweet, naive & unsuspecting full
moon. I will choose suffering before healing. I will rip my soul to shreds. I will
shine as bright as any star you have ever created. I will be folly before I flourish.
I am your son. I am my mother’s son.

Love me. Laugh with me. Smile with me. I will fulfill your plans for me because
underneath a veil of chaos, my heart will never forget that whatever your will
creates is divine & cannot be separated from its source. Whether I remember it or
not, my soul knows everything. My soul is the beating of your heart at mid day. You
rejoice in my healed and fractured mind because you know I know you never make
mistakes.

And so it was. And so it is. So you see? I said come and see and She saw … She did
come & the entire cosmos did see that I was never unworthy of her love because it is
her desire that all life should flower eternally with joy regardless the path her
beloved children choose to take.

Is it any wonder why I cry so hard? Is it any wonder why I laugh so loud? I am the
wind that churns. I am a young bird weeping. I am the center of the hawk’s red eye
and … it is hard to believe it’s been perfect from the start … yes … perfect from the
start.

I grew up in the cracks of skyscrapers. I learned to run before I could walk. I’ve
seen the world in flames. I’ve heard my Mother’s sobbing. I know your pain because I
am an old man dying. I am the newborn’s breath. I am a tree standing tall and proud
and … I am here to say it is more than fun or games or unbearable pain. It is joy and
laughter. It’s the look of love and …

I am a young bird singing. I am its Mother weeping. I am the sun & I’m laughing all
the way each & every perfect day. It is hard to believe but it’s been perfect from
the start … every day in every way, yes, perfect from the start.

10/28/2015

Posted on 10/28/2015
Copyright © 2025 Scott Utley