Forgive me If I don't spell worth a shit...

You know what's the biggest loss of all?
Watching your best friend walk angrily down the hall..
No matter what you could say, or waht you could do
You didnt know, Who could have ever knew?
The buzz had taken over his personality
and he just spent the whole night fighting gravity
You could have tied him down and yet he still would have cursed
and all of these feelings you could have tried and failed as you nursed
but as you look in hindsight it's always 20/20
and usually these kind of jokes arn't funny..
Spend hours trying to tell your story to be just rejected
and then sit back and think about all you've collected...
A bunch of pictures and happy memories..
only to fade onto into tomorrow miseries..
You had somoene who called you thier brother
and then turned around and disrespected your grandmother
What the fuck is wrong with this world today?
am I the wrong one to come true and do what I have to say?
Or should I just stand back and make the mistakes that plaged my family
am I just too blind to ever look around and see?
Fuck this.. why break my heart over this shit?
Why not just sit back and see how all the pieces fit?
For it just seems to get worse and worse
until I'm getting shuffled into a hurse...
Watching you all weep from afar..
as I get to look down from my favorite star..

What am I supposed to feel? Is all this even real?
Should I bother to care? just spend the time pulling out my hair?
Drive me insane? What's to gain?
Lose another friend? Be alone in the end?
Drive myself closer to the grave? Spend every day trying to save?
Save a little glimpse of me on here? Try to make my point clear?
Alienate you all, until you don't even recognise me anymore?
Make you think, I dont wanna read his shitty babble anymore..
Drive you all away like I seem to do to my friends
then one day pray that all this pain finally ends...

What the fuck? I'm angry...yes...
Fuck the world I'm stingy.. at best..
I want my friend back...is this a test?
Depressed? You correctly guessed.
Drunk? as a skunk...
Smoking? the funk...

This is just silly.

09/18/2003

Author's Note: I lost my best friend of 9 years tonight. This is about him. I couldnt express myself honestly.. but it's too late for that now.. ask me.. I'll tell you the story...

Posted on 09/18/2003
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