$#%@ing Leech
10/14/2001 02:39 a.m.
I thought so much of him, and at this moment, i feel as though i have wasted 10 months.

I busted my ass, i worked so hard to get my life together, to get all my bills straight, AND YOU FUCKED IT UP.

I worked so hard to be able to buy the things i've needed, to be able to afford going to a doctor. To be able to buy the shiny things ive wanted to have for months, to not have shaky hands, to not worry about food this week, or next week.

AND YOU FUCKED IT ALL UP.

And you're so apathetic that you dont even care. And your so arrogant that you dont talk about it. And you're so fucking convinced, that IM GOING TO CLEAN UP WHAT YOU'VE RUINED.

AND IM SO PATHETIC THAT I WILL.

AND I HATE MYSELF SO MUCH. I HATE MYSELF SO MUCH I WANT TO DIE, I WISH FOR BAD THINGS TO HAPPEN TO ME, I WISH I COULD DISSAPPEAR, I WISH I HAD NEVER DONE SEVERAL THINGS. YOU MAKE ME REGRET MY LIFE.

thanks.

I HAVE NO MONEY, I HAVE NO LIFE OTHER THAN YOU, I HAVE NOTHING. I HAVE NOTHING TO BE PROUD OF.

i wish that i could make something of myself, other than the fucking doormat i am.

it would have been better if you never said you cared about me at all. at least it would have been the truth. if you truly cared this would have not happened.
I am currently Disillusioned
I am listening to DJ Sakin- For the Love of a Princess (Braveheart theme remix)