i should go...
04/21/2003 04:32 p.m.
but i want to post a journal entry instead. it's weird. i was thinking about *love* ... and you know, i really suck at it. things that people who are in love do and think... i've never done or thought those things. there really is something wrong with me cause i know i've been in love. loved and been in love. two different, you know, but i've done both. and still do. but i don't... wax elegant about the future or have anxiety about a boy leaving or use words like forever. and if i do, i don't mean them. they're there (in the poem, usually) for filler or to be symbolic. "i'll love you forever" means "i'll love you for as long as i decide to love you" and that's ok with me. somehow that's the accepted language. "ok, i'll say 'forever' but you know that's only as long as i (or you) decide." hm. and i'm not writing this to belittle anyone or my feelings for anyone. maybe it's coming off like that. i certainly didn't intend that. because i do feel really strongly. i do love. but it's different than how everyone else does it. blegh. ok, you know, maybe i made absolutely no sense and should have just left for english class as i was going to. i'll do that now. yeah. jolie jordan is pretty. that new poet. she's pretty. thought you should know. yeah. that's all for now, really it is, i promise.
I am currently Paranoid
I am listening to "a sorta fairytale" by tori amos