Tea
07/01/2003 07:05 a.m.
Well today was a total daze,
and it went by like the summer wind.
I sit here sipping over a cup of tea.
The sweet tang of plum and berry swish
in my mouth.

I ponder over the lost conversations
that seem to be burned in my head.
A memory of past and present.
I see a montage dedicated to a
woman that I adore that lace my walls.
She is not real cause that would be creepy.
Rather she is a fictional person with
a list of artists who pine over her as I do.

So I sit sipping tea and taste the bitter
reality of being alone and drinking tea
alone.
I am currently Bummed

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Trivial
05/21/2003 11:38 p.m.
Do you feel alienated and out done?
I feel it all the time now and days.
They say I'm to young to think
such grave thoughts in this world.

My friends say I'm a genious,
but I feel like I'm an idiot.
I turn on the radio to listen
to a song about how people feel,
but end up feeling miserable.

They say that darkness is just
boredom taking over, and that you're
concentrating on the smallest thing.
Maybe I'm just bored.

Or maybe I'm just frustrated with
the current affairs of my life.
I'm not afraid of the world around me
cause I have little time for world affairs.
I'm not scared about not finding love.
Cause I gave up on that years ago.

I'm to primed to be foolish to be pricked by Cupid,
but a little wiser to remember the past.
So I sit alone today at work typing
away my own trivial thoughts.
I am currently Apathetic

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Work Work Work
03/14/2003 09:15 p.m.
So much to do today. I mean after work I have to stop by and pick up some groceries and then clean my apartment. I also have to go running cause we all have to escape some how with a little bit of pain that gives us health. Then when I'm tired and sleepy read a friend's script. So all in all its going to be quite a day today.
I am currently Amazed

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I'm Okay
03/07/2003 10:33 p.m.
It's been a long time since I wrote in my journal, and maybe it is because I have finally found a job to begin my dreams. Or most likely I don't think of how pathetic my life is without a woman in my life. Either or I think I'm okay with a cup of tea and telling you that my life is great so far. I have my goals and my dreams. I'm writing now more then ever, and hopefully I can sell one. Maybe I'll be famous or maybe I'll just weave my own destiny.

Any ways the world is my own to create and destroy. Most likely destroy or show the world a darker side of society. I wonder if my mind is ready to be so grim and dark. Am I ready for the responsiblity to share my bleak views with you. I hope I can or even have the chance to show it. Maybe you will like what you see or maybe you'll just make funny of me. Well I have my goals and darkness and regret are my neighbors and love is my enemy.
I am currently Better

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An end
09/24/2002 10:46 p.m.

I remember when I was a kid and remember song about rainbows. The sad ballad of my youth continues to haunt me and inspire at the same time.  I have come to an ending of a story that I created into a script.  I found pieces put together as I search for a modern day lyric of that song.

Stories
09/24/2002 03:01 a.m.
I have reached the climax of a story, and I feel so alone after I have written it.  A tragic story of how a woman travels to the end of the world to say one thing she was deprived of.  And yet I look down in my own world around me. Would I have the courage to do the same.  Would I have the courage to travel the ends of the world for this one chance to do undo what I have done to myself.  Well she get's that chance, and with a little help for the one she was searching for she finds her way back to her home.  He was there all along, and yet they loved each other, but he had to let her go.  A sacrifice so that she can find her way.  And I wonder if anybody would sacrifice so much in return.
I am currently Bleh

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Today
09/21/2002 06:23 a.m.
Well today I went to go see Ballistic Eck vs Severe.  Man was I disappointed.  The characters were tragic yet the movie did not portray it so easily.  After I while I wanted to go back home and continue reading the book I started on today.  The great job search has begun again in my mind.  I continue to force myself to find a job.  Not out bordem but out of I want a future.
I am currently Devoted

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Veteran
09/20/2002 08:38 a.m.

Did you ever listen to a sad ballad, and all you can do is think about how you have been there.  People scatter back and forth and you wonder if your just a face in the crowd or maybe there is more?  Maybe your just not another face, and maybe they understand that your not an empty husk of flesh that flies in for a moment of time.  Your not a piece of drift wood from the ocean of time and maybe your not a victim of fate or destiny, but veteran of the world.  The scars are in your eyes, and people see them each day as your sad sad eyes stare at the world each day.

A Lonely September
09/20/2002 05:20 a.m.
Things have changed over time so far. I feel so alone cause I hardly know anybody in the City of Angels. Some of my friends I contact online, but they seem so busy for me lately. I have been searching for a job in search of my dreams, but my dreams seem so distant and far right now. So I have continue to search for my dreams. I pray each night, but is it in vain? Does the higher beings understand my desires for my life in the future. So I check my AIM for a friend from my home town.
I am currently Blue

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