Marc sucks
11/12/2004 06:46 p.m.
Happy, content, confused, excited, not wanting to serve jury duty next week. Hopefully it won't take up more than three days. It'll be great to go to work after I have sat all day in a courtroom and be able to let my mind wander. 'Cause I am sure Claudia won't care that my mind is elsewhere while I clean dishes and dust things.

Hmmm, I'm thoroughly enjoying my contentness. It's great waking up in the morning and knowing that someone is thinking about you. Mike is such a dork. But that's why I love him so very very much. He's perfectly happy being himself, unlike all the other guys I know. And I love how I smile at him at random times. It's not something I have ever done and I adore it. All I need is to feel his presence and I am at ease with the world.

And now I am off to kill the cat. And clean up lots of spilled potting soil.
I am currently Cheerful
I am listening to The Ramones

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And ya both sing the same wrong words to Amazing Grace
10/04/2004 04:25 p.m.
The weather is changing. It's getting colder here, but gradually. And I only know this b/c it is kicking the crap out of my health. I hate being sick, and it was only that one day! Rawr!

Anyways, I'm still alive. Still wandering through existance trying to discover where it is I want to be. I'm anticipating seeing my friends who have ventured out into the world when they come home to visit later this month. Can't wait to hug Aricka and have her call me a bumb. Can't wait to hear about Missa's art experiments. Can't wait to hear Beth's voice telling stories about her hair, her boss, her job, her classes, her friends at college...*gets choked up and teary* Okay, new subject.

I love this feeling I have of being cradled in the arms of existance for once. It's rather nice. I'm not groping for a handhold or being torn apart by anything. The greatness of having someone who makes you smile, laugh, and feel special.
I am currently Better
I am listening to Velvet Revolver

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All by me onsies
09/19/2004 06:59 a.m.
The greatness of drug induced hazes. *lapses into a moment of admiring the psychodelic colors swirling around head* Oh, what? LOL. No, it's not that bad I swear. I feel completely normal for being on this many painkillers. The wisdom teeth were pulled without complications and I did exceedingly well for how I usually do in medical situations. I surprised the doctor and the nurses by wanting to save my two wisdom teeth...and by not fainting like they are used to my dad doing. But I stayed concious the whole time and am rather proud of myself for it. Yay!

And tomorrow I get to leave the house for a while and go see Mike. Thrilled in spades over that. Talking on the phone with him isn't the same as talking to him while snuggled in his arms. Rawr, I adore him.

I got to venture out to see the parade. And I am hoping that my beloved Civic and it's wonderful owner stayed in town overnight so I can see him too tomorrow. Didn't want to overexert myself by trying to find him today. Even though I haven't seen him since June. Hopefully someone told him I missed him.

Someone send me flowers or something. Or maybe some solid food. I am gonna die from all the soft foods. There isn't enough variety in them!
I am currently Fabulous
I am listening to midnight rain spattering the window

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Well that was stupid
08/18/2004 08:28 p.m.
I now have The Clash's 'I fought the law' stuck in my head. LOL. It's kinda funny and really not all at the same time. Man, if she wasn't already wanting to kill me, she certainly will now. Fun fun!
I am currently Stupid
I am listening to I Fought The Law

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Just walkin my beat. Mexico is my beat and I'm walkin it
08/03/2004 01:21 a.m.
Amidst so much petty female drama I was glad to be reassured Thursday and Friday. Thursday brought the immensely funny thing that was supposed wrath from a girl who thinks I am after her boyfriend. I failed to be intimidated by her harsh words (seeing as few were spelled correctly). And everyone jumped at the chance to defend me if so needed. I heart them greatly for caring so much.

Friday was a day that I saw and talked to people that mean the world to me, but are rarely there in person. My uncle stopped by work and I was thrilled. Then I got to spend time with a boy who I thought my affection for had died. And finally there was Steven, who I have known nearly my whole life, and who is one of my closest friends. We talked for a long time and he mentioned how he missed my pretty smile. I was elated.

Can't wait to get back and see everyone again.
I am listening to Nobody's Fault But Mine

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I look at you and smile because I'm fine
07/18/2004 09:47 p.m.
The last two nights were great.

Beth and Ryan's party was a bunch of fun that I had been looking forward to almost as much as they had. It was an extravaganza that left me feeling special to have warranted an invitation. To Beth and Ryan, who are both as wonderful as the moonlight:)

The cruising of last night was completely random, but entertaining. I got to see a parking lot clear out very quickly just because a cop drove by once. That was weird beyond reason (and the people I hang out with are paranoid). Dan and I ended up hanging out when everyone else had to go home and we talked about everything from our messed up relationships to the Tacoma that Dan wanted to race. Dan is one of the coolest guys I know. Who else offers to raise an army to exact revenge upon a guy for being an ass to me? I heart thee Dan!
I am currently Glad
I am listening to Mr. Brightside

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I'm not drunk I'm free
07/14/2004 05:12 a.m.
I'm free! Sort of...the claws that were sunk into my side have been pulled out of me and they are now a gaping wound waiting for that deplorable being to throw salt into it. It hurts, but it keeps reminding me of how much pain I was put through while those claws drug me along. And how much vengence I am allowed to seek because of it. I asked them, they said I could kill him if I wanted to. They said I had that right. And that they would supply metal bats if so needed. God I feel loved.
I am currently Blessed

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salt in an open wound
06/26/2004 08:14 p.m.
I have returned from the land of sunlight. I found that I enjoyed it far more than I expected to. I had no reason to please anyone while I was away and I loved that. The guys expected me to do nothing but be myself (which the sarcasm kinda got to them after a while, but they walked it off). All the worry I had bottled and taken with me I let flow away with the ocean waves. I got to feel absolute affinity with the water, true calm and serenity. It cradled me like nothing else ever has. It made me feel loved and cherished and I ached when I had to leave it. But it left its mark in the gash on my right foot. To have sea salt resting in my veins makes me happy that I went.

Now that I am here all I want is to be alone. I just need to be my introverted self for a short while, and then I will tell him the good news. Hopefully I don't kill him first.
I am currently Calm
I am listening to my grandfather playing the guitar

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I couldn't sleep...
06/19/2004 04:42 p.m.
Marla, Marla, Marla, Marla, Marla, Marla, Marla, Marla, Marla, Marla, Marla, Marla, Marla, Marla, Marla, Marla, Marla, Marla, Marla, Marla, Marla, Marla, Marla, Marla, Marla, Marla, Marla, Marla, Marla, Marla, Marla, Marla, Marla, Marla, Marla, Marla, Marla, Marla, Marla, Marla, Marla, Marla, Marla, Marla, Marla, Marla, Marla, Marla, Marla, Marla, Marla, Marla, Marla, Marla, Marla, Marla, Marla, Marla, Marla, Marla, Marla, Marla, Marla, Marla, Marla, Marla, Marla, Marla, Marla, Marla, Marla, Marla, Marla, Marla, Marla, Marla, Marla, Marla, Marla, Marla, Marla, Marla, Marla, Marla, Marla, Marla, Marla, Marla, Marla, Marla, Marla, Marla, Marla, Marla, Marla, Marla, Marla, Marla, Marla, Marla, Marla, Marla, Marla, Marla, Marla, Marla, Marla, Marla, Marla, Marla, Marla, Marla, Marla, Marla, Marla, Marla, Marla, Marla, Marla, Marla, Marla, Marla, Marla, Marla, Marla, Marla, Marla, Marla, Marla, Marla, Marla, Marla, Marla, Marla, Marla, Marla, Marla, Marla, Marla, Marla, Marla, Marla, Marla, Marla, Marla, Marla, Marla, Marla, Marla, Marla, Marla, Marla, Marla, Marla, Marla, Marla, Marla, Marla, Marla, Marla!
I am currently Sad

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"JULIA!!!!"
06/07/2004 05:07 a.m.
I feel like I am very lightweight right now. I take small steps and have the urge to grab on to something so that I don't float away into the sky. I guess I am caught up in the memory of the rain and the events it threw into motion last night. I awoke yesterday knowing something was going to happen, but I had no idea that what happened was going to be it. Great Hades, I need my feet anchored.
I am currently Content
I am listening to Jack's Smirking Revenge

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