jumbled thoughts/emotions
01/16/2004 01:06 p.m.
I've had a lot going on since shortly before Christmas... and new things happening every day.... right now I have so much spinning through my head, I can't seem to hold on to any one thought for more than 30 seconds before something else takes it's place.

I'm going to try to write some of it out later today (if I'm not bombarded at work), not here, because there is so much, I'm sure it'll be between 8-15 pages once I start writing (That's ALOT Of me to write at one time, or in one day).

The thoughts that keep tumbling/tripping over one another relate to things like:

Faith
Family
Relationships

Very important cornerstones in my life, and I'm seeing my views and feelings about these thing taking on a new shape, metamorphosizing into something slightly different... an evolution of sorts...

It is time for me to really examine myself about these things, that really and truly define me as a person... it's time for me to discover again, just who I really am...

hmmm... usually people would go through something like this before the New Year... maybe I started to then, but I find it rather interesting that Chinese New Year is next week... maybe I'm in a "window" here?
I am currently Jumbled
I am listening to the sound of my kids NOT getting ready for school!

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Thanks for the quiz tip off Lauren
01/10/2004 04:37 a.m.
I think this one is really cool!
You are guided by light. While all can be bad
around you, you still stay calm and make things
better. There aren't a lot of people in the
world like you. (Rate my test)


What force is your soul?
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Alien Life Forms?
01/10/2004 12:17 a.m.
*Warning: This content may be considered blasphemous by some, and contains my own personal opinions and observations.

I was reading the Contemporary English Version of the Bible, the book of Genesis, when I came across this passage:
Genesis 6:1-4
1-2More and more people were born, until finally they spread all over the earth. Some of their daughters were so beautiful that supernatural beings came down and married the ones they wanted. 3Then the LORD said, "I won't let my life-giving breath remain in anyone forever. No one will live for more than one hundred twenty years." The children of the supernatural beings who had married these women became famous heroes and warriors. They were called Nephilim and lived on the earth at that time and even later.


I immediately got my King James Version and read the same passage:
1 And it came to pass, when men began to multiply on the face of the earth, and daughters were born unto them,
2 That the sons of God saw the daughters of men that they were fair; and they took them wives of all which they chose.
3 And the LORD said, My spirit shall not always strive with man, for that he also is flesh: yet his days shall be an hundred and twenty years.
4 There were giants in the earth in those days; and also after that, when the sons of God came in unto the daughters of men, and they bare children to them, the same became mighty men which were of old, men of renown.

I went online and checked a few more translations…

21st Century King James Version:
1 And it came to pass, when men began to multiply on the face of the earth and daughters were born unto them,
2 that the sons of God saw the daughters of men, that they were fair; and they took for themselves wives of all whom they chose.
3 And the LORD said, "My Spirit shall not always strive with man, for he also is flesh; yet his days shall be a hundred and twenty years."
4 There were giants on the earth in those days; and also after that, when the sons of God came in unto the daughters of men and they bore children to them, the same became mighty men who were of old, men of renown.


Amplified Bible:
1WHEN MEN began to multiply on the face of the land and daughters were born to them,
2The sons of God saw that the daughters of men were fair, and they took wives of all they desired and chose.
3Then the Lord said, My Spirit shall not forever dwell and strive with man, for he also is flesh; but his days shall yet be 120 years.
4There were giants on the earth in those days--and also afterward--when the sons of God lived with the daughters of men, and they bore children to them. These were the mighty men who were of old, men of renown.


New American Standard Bible:
1 Now it came about, when men began to multiply on the face of the land, and daughters were born to them,
2 that the sons of God saw that the daughters of men were beautiful; and they took wives for themselves, whomever they chose.
3 Then the LORD said, " My Spirit shall not strive with man forever, because he also is flesh; nevertheless his days shall be one hundred and twenty years."
4 The Nephilim were on the earth in those days, and also afterward, when the sons of God came in to the daughters of men, and they bore children to them. Those were the mighty men who were of old, men of renown.

OK. Being brought up in a pretty conservative, fundamental church environment (I am very liberal in comparison to the teachings I was raised with) you can see where this might catch my attention.

This brief study was interesting to me. Personally, I have never had a problem with the idea of other life forms in the universe. Why are we constantly trying to place limits on God and add more significance and importance to ourselves, by suggesting that humans are the only sentient beings He created?

The CEV actually says that “supernatural” beings married with humans and had children.

The other versions all make a distinction between “men”, “sons of God” and “daughters of men”… there has to be a reason for the distinction. This is also the chapter that reveals God’s curse upon the earth, and Noah’s Ark… so I don’t see how “sons of God” could be referring to those who follow after God, when the entire earth was “filled with wickedness” in God’s eyes.

Both the CEV and the NASB refer to Nephilim. I do believe I have heard/read of Nephilim, as being a form or type of angel. Many people believe that angels can be manifested in a human form, so… did angels marry with humans. Who were these angels? Where they the angels that were cast out of Heaven with Lucifer? That would explain the increasing “wickedness” upon the earth, to the point that God destroyed the earth with a flood

Now I know that some people who may have read this are probably totally freaked out! Some may have serious concerns about a) my sanity and/or b) my salvation. That is their prerogative, I just found it very interesting… wonder what others think about it…

I am currently Questioning

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Things to be happy about...
01/06/2004 08:56 p.m.
on a rather ordinary day...

I got 1 hour sleep more last night than I did the night before! (and I managed to catch a 15 minute cat nap too!)

My kids went to bed last night, without too much drama, and got up this morning with only limited fussing too!

I've got all of my bills paid (everything that's come in so far, still waiting on the electric) and still have money left over...granted I don't get paid again until the 20th, but there's food in the pantry/freezer too!

While it's only about 40 degrees (about 30 with the windchill) and not the balmy 65-85 temps I prefer... at least I'm not in some horribly frozen tundra wasteland, like N. Dakota where the windchill is -26!

AND the heat works and I have flannel sheets... hmmm pj's, flannel sheets and a good book, yep sounds like a good evening to me!


I am currently Glad

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Back to (ab)Normal...
01/04/2004 04:39 a.m.
The boys came back home today. Their father said he'd bring them by at noon... so I was sleeping in today, when he showed up with them at 10am (thanks so much for calling ahead!)

so far the boys are being cooperative with keeping things put away, etc... but it hasn't even been 24 hours yet. It's one of those things where you expect the worst and hope for the best!

Oh yeah, some manure is about to hit the fan and fly nationwide! My son, in the middle of the grocery store, started mouthing off about how I "threw 'dad' out of the house", I called the "stupid (explitive)cops, and had them make 'dad'" leave"... in the middle of the grocery store!

I told him we would discuss it in the car, and he started in out it, and other things, again. My mom was with us, I couldn't get out of the grocery store fast enough. Now mind you, my oldest son had barely turned 7 and my youngest wasn't even two when their father filed for divorce!

Other nice bits of opinion and information that my children have delighted in sharing with me.... it(I) was stupid for allowing the trailer we lived in to be repossessed... 1)the payments had been behind so much that more was owed on the trailer after 3 years than what the original loan amount was. 2) The trailer was in my ex-husband's deceased grandmother's name, what good was it going to do for me to hang on to it anyway? How was I ever going to get it in my name... anyway...

So right now everything that is wrong in the world, or at least in my son's world, is my fault.... it's my fault that his dad moved out, it's my fault that he moved to California, it's my fault he doesn't have a job, etc. etc. etc... and although my son is extremely bright and intelligent, and he might understand things on an intellectual level, that doesn't mean he understands them on an emotional level... I'm not sure how I was supposed to handle all the stuff he unloaded with today, and I'm sure I probably didn't handle it in the "right" way, but I did my best, and I'm not going to allow my ex to continue to belittle and attack me to and through my children.

Oh well, thus starts 2004.. issues, issues every where, at least I've had a break and I am coping, one day at a time, one thing at a time.
I am currently Bothered

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How I brought in the New Year....
01/02/2004 06:06 a.m.
more or less alone, and that was fine.

I had a few different offers for "bringing in the New Year" but chose not to, for various reasons.
So... I stayed home alone. My boys are still with their father, so I've been very slowly cleaning up and organizing the house. Yesterday evening my bathroom was complete scrubbed up. I hung out online for a while... not a whole lot of activity here =(... and I watched one of those all day marathons on TV.

For some bizarre reason the electricity kept flashing out about 5:30 this morning. I heard the answering machine resetting 3 or 4 times.... at least the intrusion alarm didn't start going off!

Today... I could not break tradition, I went to my mom's...I had my serving of "luck" (black-eyed peas) and "money" (greens, or in my family cabbage), so now I'm ready to buy my lottery ticket! Well maybe I'll have a follow-up serving tomorrow for good measure.

I followed that with a late lunch of sushi with a friend... yummmmm sushi w/wasabi and soy sauce.

Went back by my parent's for a while, then came home and haven't done a whole lot of anything really.

My ex brought the kids by yesterday, to clean the mice's cage, and he helped (he did most of it) the boys clean their room. That was a stipulation of Christmas... if you give them more "crap" you have to help them get rid of some of the old "crap".

Really, I've rather enjoyed the peace and quiet of the past week. I needed this time for "me" with all that's been going on in my family, and the building stress and frustration over many things. I feel almost (not quite though) renewed. Definitely been recharged, hopefully I'll be able to make it for a while now, barring anything too major happening, but I'm optimistic about it all.

And, I was chosen to be the first spotlight for 2004! What an extraordinary honor! I don't really feel deserving of the honour, but can't say enough how exciting,thrilled and overwhelmed, and...the list is endless... Thanks!

I have so many good friends here, and have had the privelege of reading some outstanding writing by other members. There is so much talent here! This place is awesome! The design is awesome! and the members here, well you all make it even more awesome!


I can't click all my mood choices! I'm thankful, giddy and reflective... and ... I'm a goober! lol

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Thanks John...
12/19/2003 02:14 p.m.
I love these quizzes... John Wesley Morgan had this one in his journal, so I just had to go try it out...


Athena


?? Which Of The Greek Gods Are You ??
brought to you by Quizilla




two things interest me about the results...

1) When I was an early teen (and hadn't really studied mythology... nor had a grasp on reality) I fell in love with the name Athena... and hoped to one day have twin girls to name, of all things, Athena and Adena

2) I guess it's appropriate that I'm a teacher, and avid/life-time learner and student.

I am currently Nerdy

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It's Lori's Fault!
11/18/2003 01:30 a.m.
Every time I see a cool quiz I have to check it out. This one was in Lori's Journal... and it is SO me it's almost Scary!!


Protector


The ULTIMATE personality test
brought to you by Quizilla



In other news... Half of Houston is under water again. When I FINALLY left work (intermediate school) at 6:20, there were still about 100 students who couldn't get home! The boys and I are safe from high water in our second floor apartment. The dogs were VERY happy for us to get home. They had been in their kennel on my patio (it's about 10'x20'). We're under a flood watch until 9:30 tonight! I'll be watching late night news tonight to see if school is cancelled.

I am currently Tired

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That's interesting....
10/31/2003 02:18 p.m.

I'm terza rima, and I talk and smile. Where others lock their rhymes and thoughts away I let mine out, and chatter all the while. I'm rarely on my own - a wasted day Is any day that's spent without a friend, With nothing much to do or hear or say. I like to be with people, and depend On company for being entertained; Which seems a good solution, in the end. What Poetry Form Are You?

Guess it's time for me to focus on that thread in the "Words at Play" forum
I am currently Fine

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